I didn't notice...

Let me begin with a story.
In 1979, I went to  Ankara, Turkey, with my husband, who was on a business trip. I was the only wife on the trip.

While the men were at their seminar, I explored the city--mostly walking, but occasionally taking a cab. I was intimidated by the unfamiliar culture, so I didn't venture into  the market or a mosque. I did find the old citadel of the city and wandered the ancient streets. I also found the Roman baths, which I had to myself. I was motioned off the far wall of Ataturk's tomb by a rifle-carrying soldier while I was trying to get a picture of the city. And I  negotiated the purchase of Turkish rug for a friend at home.

Our first night in Ankara, we were wined and dined by a NATO general and his wife at the Officer's Club. There were three women at the table that evening: the general's wife, a young American translator, and me. It was a multicourse meal with all the accompanying silver and crystal served by young soldiers in crisp, white uniforms. I was seated next to the general. And I was terrified. This was the stuff of Upstairs/Downstairs, not dinner at the Wardlaws and definitely not dinner at the Ashbys. But the general and his wife were kind, and I don't think I embarrassed myself or our country.

The next evening, the Turkish soldier who had been assigned to the visiting scientists took us out for an authentic Turkish meal. The restaurant was full, and the owner asked us to wait at a small tea shop nearby. Sure enough when they were ready for us, a boy came and tapped on the window of the shop and escorted us back to the restaurant.

It was a huge place, filled with men eating, drinking, and smoking. As we were led down the length of the room, up some stairs, and across the upstairs room to our table, I  became acutely aware that there were no women in the entire place. None! I was in shock. Was I violating some deep-seated cultural tradition? Should I be in this place? Where were the women!

With each step, I grew more and more self-conscious and intimidated. By the time we were seated at our table, I was in a panic. I gasped to my neighbor, a gentle English scientist, "There are no women in here." He looked around and said very casually, "I didn't notice."

This story has been a metaphor for me for the past 34 years.

After the hard-fought battles for women's equality and for our place at the table, I naively thought that we had made sufficient progress that women had earned their place and were welcome at the table. We aren't there in great numbers, but we do have seats on the Supreme Court and other courts; there is a record number of women in Congress [still not very many, but more]; we have had two female secretaries of state, as well as other Cabinet members; and there are more women in management positions in business.

But no, we aren't even close to sufficient progress. Women are still being offered crumbs from the Head Table; we are token members of the leadership club of American society. And in most countries of the world, women are still struggling to make it into the dining room.
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/27/opinion/sunday/kristof-shes-rarely-the-boss.html?smid=fb-share&_r=0

The board of trustees at my alma mater, Wilson College, a women's college in south central Pennsylvania, decided two weeks ago to make the college co-ed. The school is in serious financial trouble, and guess what, Men are the answer to all those woes. Women's education is no longer necessary in this country; only 2% of high school girls are interested in a women's college; and without men, the college will fail.

In 1979, the same year of my trip to Turkey, the board of  trustees voted to close the college. The alumnae of the college said "No," took the board to court, won the decision to keep the school open, and raised more than $1 million to allow the school to open in September. In the subsequent years, the alumnae did everything for the college: they mowed grass and weeded flower beds; they taught classes; they raised money;  they recruited new students, and much, much more. The alumnae, aka Wild Wilson Women, raised our alma mater from the ashes.

This time there don't seem to be any legal issues that can be used against the board, but many of the alumnae are not ready to give up on the college as a women's college. We are passionate about the value of a women's college. This story is not done.

The pain of the crisis at Wilson is almost unbearable. But as I look around me in January 2013, I am discouraged. I just attended the Mere Anglicanism conference in Charleston, SC, and my heart is weighed down by all the white men dressed in black, wearing dog collars, by a Eucharist led only by men facing East [that means the congregation gets to see their rear ends], by a program led only by men and attended overwhelmingly by white men.

The program this year was excellent; all five speakers were top-notch scholars teaching good solid Christian theology. But where are the women? There were maybe two or three female priests, in cognito.

Women were not invited to and are not welcome at this table, which should represent our Lord's table.

Letter to Chair of the Board of Trustees

I understand that you are looking to Wheaton College as a model for the co-ed Wilson. Rather than look to the women's colleges that have gone co-ed, please look at the women's colleges that are succeeding.

 

Hollins is exemplary [www.hollins.edu]. Their motto is "Women who are going places start at Hollins." Look at their Web page entitled, "Why Hollins?"

Why does Wilson College have to fade into the oblivion of a ho-hum coed school nestled between Gettysburg, Dickinson, and Shippensburg and under the shadow of Penn State? Pennsylvania has lots of small co-ed schools.

 

Wilson is and always has been unique. Use the moneys aimed at going co-ed to make her even better for the 21st century.

 

Put the money necessary to provide male dorms and athletic facilities into our facilities for the Women with Children program, for our athletes including the gymnasts, and for the new programs needed to make her even more attractive to the women of the 21st century.

 

Please note that I have donated $1100 to Wilson in the past two months, and I am working with two high schools students to get them to Wilson. And I am just one alumna who is willing to put my money and my time into the women's college that gave me so much.

Sincerely your,

Beth Ashby Mitchell '69

December 3, 2012

48 years ago today, I received my acceptance letter from Wilson College. I had applied for "Early Decision" [I agreed to apply to Wilson alone, and I would hear back in early December] because Wilson was the only place I wanted to go.

Set the Scene:
I lived in Bellevue, PA, the first suburb outside of Pittsburgh along the Ohio River, population ~5000. Bellevue High comprised grades 7 through 12. There was no cafeteria--and no school buses or parking lots--so all of the students walked to and from school all of the time, including lunch time.

However, senior year I had a part in a play, which rehearsed at lunch time, so I couldn't go home at lunch time to check our mail. Our landlady agreed to check the mail for me each day, and I would call her from school. On December 3, 1964, the letter from Wilson came; she opened it and read it to me. I think the entire high school heard my whoops of joy and excitement. And my teachers, office staff, and fellows students shared my enthusiasm. I think my mom and I went out to dinner to celebrate that evening.

I did not graduate from Wilson, and I have always been sorry about that. To cover the awkward questions, I just say that I finished at GW after I was married.

Wilson was my school; and one of my closest friends is my roommate from Wilson.

I was not part of the Save Wilson movement; I had just moved to Maryland with a 3-yr old and a newborn. One of my classmates was chair of the Board of Trustees, and I trusted her judgment.

However, in the fall of 1979, I reconnected with Sue Brooks who had been active in Save Wilson. She introduced me to the Baltimore Wilson Club and saw to it that I got back on campus. I met some amazing women and got involved in numerous projects on campus. Barb Tenney noticed me and nominated me for the Alumnae Board.

My three years on the board were life-changing. I was a stay-at-home mom with no intellectual outlet. On the board, I was a leader among many leaders. Wilson College gave me what it gives every graduate--an opportunity to grow and lead.

To be continued.

Today the Wilson College Board of Trustees begin a two-day deliberation on how to turn around the desperate financial state of the college. Among several options being put forth by the president is the option of going co-ed. The alumnae have been kept in the dark about the financial situation [running on a deficit budget for the past three years, plus millions of dollars of debt].

These are alumnae who in 1979 went to court and kept the college from closing. We have been known as Wild Wilson Women for decades. We know how to think outside the box [what box?], and we are very generous to our alma mater.

Alumnae are gathering on campus today and tomorrow in a vigil of support for the college. I am going up tomorrow. And in the meantime, I am keeping the entire Wilson community in my thoughts and prayers.

Wilson was established as a women's college in 1869, and has been dedicated to women's education ever since. It is one of very colleges who offer a Women and Children program for single moms that allows them to live on campus with their children.

Adding a few men to the enrollment will not save the college, especially in an area full of excellent co-ed institutions.